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SALFORD CITY REDS HEAD COACH VACANCY
 

Star date: 18th November 2011

A Salford Star Exclusive!!!

ADVERT FOR MATT PARISH REPLACEMENT

Salford City Reds coach, Matt Parish resigned yesterday, but Salford Star has managed to get an exclusive preview of the advert for the new Head Coach, written by Mr Salford Reds himself, Jack Rogers….

See exclusive advert here…


WANTED:  HEAD COACH SALFORD CITY REDS

Salary: Peanuts but negotiable - you can have dry roasted or salted.
Salford City Reds is a rapidly (backwards) moving Superleague club. We need a cheap `Yes' man or woman to ensure that the move to our `iconic' new stadium goes without a hitch and that visiting spectators have a great day, with their team having no difficulties on the pitch.

You will be responsible to the Board of Directors whose knowledge of the game has filled the back of a couple of small stamps, and will be responsible for a group of players whose best days are behind them and who spend their time on Twitter.

Essential Characteristics…

• We seek to employ an individual who shares the Board's vision of being poor relations to Sale Sharks in our new home at Stinky Bridge Stadium.
• We seek an individual who has opinions and values which are the same as ours.
• We seek an individual who is willing to invest his/her time in our club, without us investing in them.
• We seek an individual who is media savvy, who talks a good game and can respond to a question without resorting to an honest answer.
•  We seek an individual who does not want to hog our lime light when we win, but is willing to hog it when we get beat.
•  We seek an individual with messiah like qualities who can turn empty promises into money.
•  We seek an individual who doesn't like to rock the boat – Hazel Blears need not apply.

If you are successful enough to make it to interview, to avoid confusion such as what has happened in the past, we feel we should also provide meanings to some of our statements…

• When we say we expect to see a full stadium.... we mean full of empty seats
• When we say we want to see the best players... we mean playing for other teams
• When we say we are a hot bed of youth rugby... we mean we are, but we let them sign for other teams
• When we say we have ambition... we mean we only want to stay in Superleague, as cheaply as possible.
• When we say you can spend money... you can! But it has to be your own, as we're not going to spend money on this rubbish, and Salford Council are skint so we can't get anymore hush hush cash injections.
• When we say you're exactly what we want... it means you're the only candidate.


I think that about covers it! If the club uses this they should get the person they want and deserve…

See Jack Rogers' opinion piece from yesterday's Salford Star, before the resignation was announced - click here
 

SICK OF THEM ALL wrote
at 12:46:13 on 20 November 2011
Eugene is correct ,. But these unsavoury , self-serving people are NOT untouchable . If we investigate enough , who knows what we will find ...Hopefully enough evidence to GET RID OF THE LOT OF THESE LEECHING , PARASITIC SCUM . One thing is certain , they are as rotton as the MPs, MEPs and the E.U. , who have all been bloodsucking decent people for many years .
?
careful with that axe Eugene. wrote
at 08:13:01 on 20 November 2011
To follow a similar post below. If im correct John Merrys fellow board member Steven Broomhead was Chief Executive of Warrington Borough Council when he authorised public money to be given to Warrington rugby league club, to my knowledge this money has never been repaid. This is an absolute disgrace and yet the North West media totally ignore it. Steven Broomhead is now chairman of the said rugby league club replacing his pal Lord Hoyle who was investigated for receiving brown envelopes off the mass weapons of destruction supplier BAE. Now lets wind forward, is this the same Steven Broomhead who sent a text about 'dying pakis' and who Salford coucils leader said "i know he is not racist" and "ive seen worse". Unfortunately yes he is and in light of Sepp Blatters remarks would Merry go on record to defend him, yes he probably would if he thought he was defending a fellow crony. Sadly folks, people like Blatter, Merry , Hoyle, Broomhead, Spicer ETC ETC ETC are all untouchable while we continue to chew the cud......
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Scott White wrote
at 08:12:18 on 20 November 2011
Salford City Reds are run by idiots. No question to be answered there. That a Lib Dem like Mary Ferrer, a supporter of Nick Clegg and the ConDem Government, who are actively ripping the heart out of this country with their obnoxious and politically motivated cuts, should be critical of ANYONE, shows what a peverse world we live in. Mary is a cretin, don't listen to the shit she and brainless Norman Owens spout. And ignore what Labour and the Tories say too. Think for yourselves proud Salfordians! Ignore idiots like Antrobus, Merry and Ferrer. Amd remember, the only good Tory is a dead Tory.
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DAVE wrote
at 20:35:21 on 19 November 2011
Definately a big white elephant at Barton as far as Salford council tax payers are concerned . Salford people will derive no benefit from this farce , despite funding it . The question is , what are the clouncil getting out of it ???????????? How did they get away with it ??????????? The clouncil must answer for this .
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D. FOE wrote
at 18:23:38 on 18 November 2011
This inept council tossing OUR money away in funding the Salford Reds WITHOUT ANY PUBLIC CONSULTATION is an absolute disgrace . This very unsavoury episode needs in-depth scrutiny and a public investigation . As usual , the Swinetown Cretins in their arrogance have tossed OUR money away like confetti . Just how are the Salford people , who fund this excess , ever going to benefit ? This stinks ...
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caroline wrote
at 18:22:46 on 18 November 2011
He has left now..why we do not no...It is clear he was happy..and now he has left,,He is a guy doing a job with great money..Who would walk away from that..Whatever is going on in Salford re;loans etc ..this is nothing to do with him..Do not be unkind...
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Nachtschlepper wrote
at 18:22:27 on 18 November 2011
No Mr Bowden it's having a crap team that has held Salford Reds back for years!
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mary ferrer wrote
at 15:44:38 on 18 November 2011
PETER BOWDEN, I AM GOING TO USE CAPITALS FROM START TO FINISH THIS TIME. WE THE PEOPLE OF SALFORD HAVE FOR THE LAST 3 YEARS KEPT THIS CLUB AFLOAT AND WE HAVE ALSO BUILT THEM A NEW STADIUM WITH OUR MONEY. DON'T THINK I WOULD WANT TO GIVE THEM MY TIME AS WELL, OR ARE YOU SAYING WE SHOULD DO SOMETHING WITHIN THE COMMUNITY WE LIVE. BECAUSE IF THAT IS THE CASE I HAVE GIVEN OVER 25 YEARS OF MY LIFE TO MY COMMUNITY AND NOW I AM ALSO HELPING TO RUN BLOODY SALFORD REDS AND BUILD THEM A STADIUM. MAY I ASK WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, IF YOU ARE A RESIDENT I MEAN OTHER THAN FUND SALFORD REDS.
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COUNCIL SCEPTIC. wrote
at 14:54:11 on 18 November 2011
Well said Mary, i wonder if our leader has been lined up for the board or even chairman. It has all such a similar feel to his mate at Warrington B C who lent - gave their rugby league club a sackful of public money and then was made chairman. It really is a national disgrace how this kind of thing is allowed to go on and deserves an extensive public investigation.
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Peter Bowden wrote
at 14:53:43 on 18 November 2011
It is attitudes like that among the residents of Salford that has held the City Reds back for years. Too happy to sit in your ivory tower and complain rather than get out and do something useful with your time. The use of capital letters should only be at the start of a sentence or for proper nouns. If you wish to emphasize something you should use an exclamation mark!
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mary ferrer wrote
at 11:47:19 on 18 November 2011
I am wondering are we building a BIG white elephant at Barton??? I read an artical yesterday about Mr Parish and there was a quote " HE FELT HE WAS MISLEAD OVER THE STATE OF SALFORDS FINANCES" Well Mr Parish you are not on your own. The residents of Salford have in the last 3 years given loans well over ONE MILLION POUNDS that I know of plus another £250.000 by the backdoor (lease on land we own)We have entered into a loan of 22 MILLION PLUS to build the stadium.So WE also have been MISLEAD by SALFORD Council. This has turned out to be a very EXPENSIVE EGO TRIP by both The club and THE COUNCIL that WE the residents could be paying back for YEARS and YEARS.
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