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MARY BURNS AWARDS 2007

Welcome to the MARYS, the most glittering occasion in Salford’s community calendar. Here we honour the most deserving individuals and organisations in the city for their stupid statements, dodgy dealings and iffy activities over the past 12 months.

Please dress up in a monkey jacket or yer best frock while you read this and grab a glass of warm white wine. We would be grateful if you could applaud to yourself after each award is announced. Now, without further ado, let’s get on with the ceremony…

 

THE GEORGE BUSH `READ MY LIPS’ AWARD
THE FEED THE RICH AWARD (Part 1)
THE FEED THE RICH AWARD (Part 2)
THE `OUR FRIENDS IN THE NORTH’ MEMORIAL AWARD

THE WE WANT OUR PENNY AND OUR BUN AWARD

THE `WE DON’T GIVE A FLYING FIG ABOUT WEASTE’ AWARD
THE AFFORDABLE HOUSE IN YER DREAMS AWARD
THE `Of Course We’re Not Trying To Clear The Community Out Of Central Salford That’s Next To Manchester, The River, The University and the BBC Media City Site’ AWARD…
THE `LET’S LOAN PUBLIC MONEY TO A BANK’ AWARD
THE `WE’RE SO GREEN IT (REALLY IS) UNBELIEVABLE’ AWARD
THE `YOU’RE TWISTIN’ MY MELON MAN’ MAD, MAD, MAD, MUSIC AWARD
THE `UNCLE’ JOE STALIN AWARD FOR OPEN AND DEMOCRATIC GOVERNMENT
THE `EVERYBODY LOVES US’ AWARD
THE FRAZER `WE’RE ALL DOOOMED’ AWARD
THE `Who can say, 'I have kept my heart pure; I am clean and without sin'? AWARD
THE `WHAT A GREAT SCHOOL! LET’S SHUT IT!’ AWARD
THE SPECIAL AWARD FOR BEING HAZEL BLEARS

 

THE `OUR FRIENDS IN THE NORTH’ MEMORIAL AWARD

Goes to…

SALFORD CITY COUNCIL

The top ‘90s BBC series, starring Salford’s own Christopher Eccleston, and centred around dodgy towerblock dealings between councils and private developers, has been honoured with this very special Mary…

Unfortunately Christopher is unable to be here in person to present the award but judges had no hesitation in choosing Salford City Council for its sterling work in the area around Salford Precinct, known as the Pendleton Area Action Plan.

Yes, after two year’s worth of (kind of) consultations with the community, the majority of residents made it clear that they wanted family housing to be built. The Council report into Developing the Options concluded that “It is proposed to promote the provision of larger apartments, which could be suitable for families…”

In other words, they planned to put families back in towerblocks …recognised historically as one of the biggest housing fiascos of all time.

And what’s more, after the Council spent thousands of pounds on consultants and consultations and DVDs to every home in the area urging everyone to have a say in the Pendleton plan, it looks like the whole thing’s been ditched anyway. A Council Planning Report on October 31st stated “it is not considered necessary to continue with the production of the Area Action Plan”…

So now they can just do what the developers tell them to do, no doubt…

Ahem, our lawyers have asked us to point out that the presentation of this award in no way implies any dodgy dealings between private developers and Salford City Council or its employees…

   

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